TLDR: Gatekeeping definition

I’m sure I don’t have to tell you what this feels like if you have any social interest that involves other people but I’m going to detail my own experiences and hopefully warn/reassure you and hope that you’ll share your own experiences in the comments

Special Lingo:  This has always gone straight up my nose. For reenactors it is “kit” for renfaire folks it is “garb” and I am sure there are other terms but at this juncture, no one gives a rat’s arse. To the world, it is “costume” or “outfit.” Please don’t whack people over the head with this.

BAD EXAMPLE:
person: So I was working in my costume…
Vendor GARB!!!!!!!!

GOOD EXAMPLE:
Person: So I was working on my costume…
Vendor: Great, what were you thinking of adding?  Discusses options. Obliquely mentions that keyword is often garb or kit.

But to be honest, if I have to mention this example to you, you need more guidance than a blog post and I’d like you to take a hard look at your social interactions.

When Guilds were making their way east a lot of people, rather than saying “Hey what a fun inclusive activity we could join” were, instead “Keep out, this is our clubhouse and we are better than you.” The first renfaire I worked I tried to point out some bad behavior and they became so obsessed with “Which Wenches Guild?!!!” that the offender was able to walk off and presumably be a pest again.  I made the mistake of instead physically describing what she was wearing and her general appearance, foolish me. And I was reprimanded for it.

For me, this includes terms like “Mundanes” and “Muggles”.  I want *everyone at the renfaire and it’s nicer if we don’t exclude with language.

Clothing; Our group is fairly forgiving. We have a ton of clothing we give, loan, and swap. Same with equipment.  When I see someone in a white pirate shirt, jeans, ring belt, and pleather boots, they will still get a full M’Lord and M’Lady from me.  And I don’t mock others for not having the capital to get high-end gear. I feel this is especially important during this period of economic and social stress. We need to be kind and fun with one another. Not everyone has disposable income.

I am not averse to stealing ideas from other blogs/discussions and there was a post

“What is your unpopular Renfaire Opinion”  

Here’s mine (one of many)

Don’t be nasty to the paying customers. I don’t care what people wear as long as 1) it isn’t showing bits 2) Overtly advertises a lifestyle.

And what I mean is there are subtle ways to let folks know your predilections but people on leashes aren’t one of them.

And if a larger person is rocking a Red Sonia Look or Viking, keep that shit to yourself. You wish you had that confidence.

And much as the Viking horned helmets may make me roll my eyes, I take them in a jolly spirit and roll with it.   And nice and loud for the people in the back

PATRONS ARE NOT REENACTORS AND SHOULD NOT BE JUDGED BY THOSE STANDARDS.

This means that furries, Vikings show fans, Jac Sparrows, Zorros, Anime…etc.  I love you all, please spend money and leave tips.  Thank you for coming.

Don’t Eat Your Own–This blog post

And honestly, if you are a performer or vendor, shouldn’t you be thinking about your next leap forward and betterment?  If you aren’t already thinking about the next big thing, you should be and that’s a better use of your time, effort, and brain space.

Or just be a petty bastard in the privacy of your own home, where I don’t have to hear you.